How Understanding Temperament Helped My Relationship

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When Peter and I first began courting, one factor that will actually frustrate me was how lengthy he took to make choices. He’d prefer to assume issues by, have a look at one thing from all angles, and actually sink into what the choices would possibly look or really feel like.

Me? I’d hear a few enjoyable or fascinating thought and wish to attempt it out instantly, figuring we’d work out the small print as we went. I used to spend time questioning why he was taking so lengthy to determine, and I couldn’t perceive why he couldn’t make a alternative on the fly.

This was notably apparent in our early years collectively after I’d obtain work and talking invites. I’d assume, ‘That sounds enjoyable!’ and be able to say sure with out a second thought. Peter would extra intentionally assess the invitation and take into account whether or not the trouble / reward relationship was cheap. At first, I assumed this was fairly limiting!

However, as my understanding about temperament deepened, I additionally got here to understand that we’re constructed otherwise and that totally different approaches can have worth. I’ve discovered that some reflection can result in higher experiences total.

There are 4 temperaments, and also you possible have one or two temperament mixtures that flavour your character. Certainly one of my fundamental temperaments is sanguine and considered one of Peter’s is melancholic.

The sanguine temperament is fast shifting, with a vigorous curiosity. Melancholic is extra methodical and measured. Are you able to see how we’d have run into points?!

Studying extra about temperament helped me realise extra about what I want – and higher perceive Peter’s method. Over time, I prefer to assume we’ve every grown and advanced, shifting into appreciating not simply the opposite’s tendency, but in addition the worth of a distinct method.

Whereas I nonetheless prefer to have enjoyable pursuits I can transfer simply into and out of, I’ve discovered that at the very least for a few of life’s larger choices, a extra considerate, thought of method might be useful. Peter has come to grasp that about some matters and issues, I’m going to flit about and tweak issues seemingly on a whim.

All relationships turn out to be fields for progress and evolution, and incorporating an understanding about temperament has been one device that I’ve discovered useful alongside the best way.

I educate about temperament in my Intro to Relationship Astrology course, which is an intermediate coaching for astrology college students who wish to achieve a deeper understanding of relationship compatibility and timing by the lens of astrology.

Have you ever labored with temperament earlier than? Are you aware your fundamental 1 or 2 temperament tendencies?